I don't remember the last time I felt this upset and so emotional for almost no reason at all.
So what is it this time that tears me down like this?

And at times like this, I wonder how more emotional one can get.

Could it be love that makes me feel this way?

Possibly and I would dare say definitely.


Don't ache, this heart of mine, love is nothing but just a feeling. Love is something not meant to be cried over. Love, don't do this to me. You're tearing me apart and leaving me with tears all night long. I can see no one standing next to me wrapping me in his arms, assuring me that it'll be a better day tomorrow. Maybe tomorrow, love will treat me better. Maybe tomorrow, I will find new love.

I'm not confused. I know I'm not. However, I'm unsure. I'm unsure of what I'm feeling.

How easy can letting someone you loved a long time go? It is not easy I know. Then again, here I am standing, facing this thing I know as love.

Ahh, I want to sleep. I want to cuddle up like a baby on my bed under my blanket. Then shut my eyes, have a fairy tale dream and hopefully, I feel better when I wake up tomorrow morning.

I feel like crying, so much right now. Just cry and let it all out but - then again, what's gonna be left of me? It is not wrong to cry, but I guess it's wrong to cry for no reason at all.

Why am I feeling this way?

Have I been rejected? Erm, not exactly but partly; but that isn't the main reason why I'm feeling this emo, is it? No, it is not.

I have to let someone i loved go. Can I do it? Do I need more time? I guess so, yeah.

Is something bothering me? Is someone asking me to do something all the time; pressuring me over and over and over again? And today it just ticks off? Yes, but it isn't the main reason of my emotional situation now either.

Did I feel unwanted today? I did, by a certain someone, but that definitely is not the reason, either.

I guess, add all 4 up, you'll have an emotional me standing here then.

Ahh. I want my bed.

At times I cry so much, I just really wish, that...

=/




Nitez world..
May love makes the world a little smaller tonight.

I feel like I'm like a trapped bird, in a pretty white cage.

A broken hearted one.

Chirping a sad tune.

How I wish I can be let free.

Run wild and have beautiful days.

No tears, no pains.

Just a carefree, simple life.

Can someone come and set me free?

You may not know it, but just simple words can already lift my heart and spirit.

I'm that down, but yet, I shall put on a fake smile for the world to see.


Nitez world.

ooh~!

Look guys~ An email from the Organizers:

Greetings!

On behalf of the main organizer of The Malaysia Supermodel Search 2009, I would like to say congratulations in having the courage to pursue your dreams. I would also like to say thank you to all the contestants of The Malaysia Supermodel Search 2009 for allowing us to “Transform Your Dreams into Realities” & usher you into the journey in becoming Malaysia’s First Ford Supermodel of the World.

While you continue to pull votes to secure a place in the “Top 100 Elimination”, the main organizer would like to give you a glimpse of the journey you are about to experience.

The Journey in finding Malaysia’s First Ford Supermodel

• Three photos of every registered contestant have been sent to Ford Models New York for first castings on the 24^th August 2009. All successful contestants from the first castings will be placed into our “potential” file. 50% of your total result will be contributed from the First Castings.

• All voting will be officially closed on the 27^th August 2009 midnight. Your votes will then be accumulated and the Top 100 contestants with the highest votes will be assessed. Voting will contribute a total of 50% into your final result.

• The Top 100 contestants will be chosen based on 50% from First Castings & 50% from SMS votes. The 100 successful contestants will receive a SMS text indicating that you have made it into the Top 100. So WATCH OUT models for your SMS on the 27^th August 2009!!!

• The Top 100 will need to attend a “Big Elimination" on the 28^th August 2009 at Bangsar Village 2 Concourse. All 100 successful contestants should arrive at 1pm for rehearsal and the main judging will start at 8pm. Absence from the rehearsal & judging will cause you to be disqualified. So MARK THIS DATE down in your calendar!!!

Congratulations for making it this far! I wish you all the best in the Top 100 Elimination & NEVER stop believing in your dreams!!!

Sincerely,

Wen-Ji

Event Director & Executive Producer

The Malaysia Supermodel Search 2009

Malaysia Ford Supermodel of the World

LoLL.

So again, remember to vote for me please (and i will love u all more muahaha)

Send SMS: VOTE MSS047 to 32300.

Voting ends 27/8/2009 (that's tomorrow!) midnight!

Thanks in advance for those who sent in the votes ;)
xoxo <- for those voters <3

p/s: still, i think i might not be able to make to the top 100,
even if i do, i probably get kick again during the Big Elimination in Bangsar, LOL :)


Cheers and good night. Sleep now, it's raining and you dont have to turn your air-cond on =p
Nights world.

Puh-leez.

Dear friends,

I need a big favor from you guys! I got called for entering a reality show for a search for The Malaysia supermodel Search 2009, months ago.
Anyway, now is only the elimination round, so it depends on the amount of votes they receive from each participant.
The Female (there'll be a male winner as well), winner will win RM50,000 and gets to be on the front cover of FHM, and she'll be representing Malaysia to US to compete with the rest to win USD$250,000.
Obviously, i'm not planning to go that far, but i just wanna be in it for experiences' sake. :)

Therefore, pretty please, with sugar icing on top, help me through voting for me. All you have to do is SMS: VOTE MSS047 and send it to 36300.

Voting ends at 27/8/2009 midnight. (RM1/vote)

I promise I will love you (those who votes for me only :p) more :D ♥ ♥

I sort of forgotten the details, but I will dig it up and then let you guys know. Please please vote :D

Cheers with loads of love

♥

P/S: For those of you who also know Trishil and her boyfriend, vote for them too! I dont know their MSS numbers, so ask them :D

Love ya'll

robbed!

It was about 530 in the evening when i reached DJ yesterday. I got a computer next to Kelvin's and was playing CoD4, but somehow i didnt feel right; i had no mood to play COD4 despite me coming over to Blitz just to play COD4. Anyway about an hour later, something happened.

Cookie/Nick, my teammate, who was playing in Sri Petaling branch, was playing one on one sniper with Kelvin and i was spectating. Then i heard someone yelling and banging the table. I looked up and saw a fat malay guy there and he was holding a stick. I thought he was playing with his friend, but then suddenly another thin malay guy came towards my direction, he was holding a small axe. Then did i realized the fat one was actually holding a parang, a rusted about 25 cm long parang. The thin guy walked towards Kelvin and me and was yelling, "Dompet handpone semua keluar!" and was waving his small axe as if to let us know he was not kidding. THAT exact moment i realized we were actually being robbed!

In BROAD DAYLIGHT.

Anyway. Kelvin and i tried tossing our handphones under the computer table, but he knew. So i just gave up and took my phone and gave it to him, and so did Kelvin. I opened my wallet and took out RM30 though in my wallet there was RM5. I dont think he even bother cause he didnt check. What a dork. Anyway, they went around and i looked around, i noticed not everyone was paying attention to the robbers. There was one guy sitting way corner who was left untouched. And there were even a few guys who actually continued playing. I looked at Chucky, and he gave me the, 'Calm down, dont do anything stupid,' look. Kelvin was cursing. I tried consoling him. Anyway, i decided to play as well. So i joined the public game.

Cookie was disconnected from Kelvin because Kelvin pulled out his computer wayar. I joined the public server and saw cookie there. He asked me what happened. And i said:

Blit got robbed.
Now.
Do smth

And then left. I did see him type serious? Anyway, i watched how the robbers act. When they thought they had everything done, the fat guy decided to leave.
He came into Zone 2 and told the thin guy, lets go. I stood up. And slowly walked behind the 4 robbers. They left the place, and i turned around, and saw a whole lot of people stood up from the corner of the cyber cafe. They were asking themselves in Chinese, "Wanna chase?"
I turned around, and i didnt want to give chase, i just wanted to know their mode of transport and where they were heading to.
I opened the door and i heard the guys behind me saying, "LETS CHASE!"

I stepped out of the cafe and looked around. Didnt see the fat guy but i saw the thin one who was holding the small axe earlier on. As fast as lighting, the guys were already outside as well, and they spotted the thin robber, who was actually slow and taking his sweet time just wanting to start his motorcycle engine. He saw a bunch of guys outside the cafe, he panicked, dropped everything, and began to run. I turned towards the lane at my left and saw the rest of the 3 robbers; they were already on the bikes and they did turn back, but zoomed off as they saw the guys appearing there and yelling at them. Back to the thin guy, he tried running, a stupid move, because there were about 30-40+ people chasing after him from all directions. He climbed a slope and wanted to run but i heard a car honk and i think that was what stalled him, and he was caught by a few guys, Kelvin was the first few. I was still standing outside of the cafe, and then Chucky came out. He told me, "Cat, stay here." He went to his car which was parked nearby and i saw him took out a metal rod. There were so many people around, i think everyone in Blitzone came out to have either a revenge or just to have a look.
In the end, i walked up the slope as well and the guys were punching the robber. I did not go over, but i did see many people video-recording and taking pictures. Kelvin got me, and he told me, "I got your phone."
I sighed. OMG. My phone! He was the one took it, and he was the one caught too.

It was chaos, very chaotic! Passer by who walk by just asks, "Was it a robber?"
Kelvin told me the robber was bleeding. And a while later, the police came and took him away.

The fat robber seemed pretty confident when he was doing the robbery thingy, but after that i saw him run away like a chicken. I heard people say it was the same robbers who robbed Pro X a few weeks/months ago.

I'm glad i got my phone back. Thanks Kelvin! <3

But i lost RM30, sob.

I'm glad the robber is caught, and im sure those who were robbed are too.

I was pretty shaken up, but then was okay after that. SIGH. =/

LOL.

Anyway to those who had the same fate as me, hope you guys are ok, and i really do pray they catch the other 3 robbers. Gawd, especially the fat one.

Random post~

Just for fun!
I know these people by name xD

Aaron Lee
Aaron Ang
Aaron Chai

Amanda Choong
Amanda Hiew
Amanda Ho

Amelia Chin
Amelia Ang
Amelia Natasha

Alex Koh
Alex Liew
Alex Yeo
Alex K Philip
Alex Soo
Alex Tan

Adrian Chow
Adrian Teh
Adrian Rhaphsody (dunno how to spell lol)
Adrian Lee Kong Yew
Adrian Low
Adrian Ng
Adrian Corleone

Amir Faliq
Amir Firdaus

Alvin Lim
Alvin Low
Alvin Ng

Andrew Chan
Andrew Chang
Andrew Ooi
Andrew Tan
Andrew Yong

Benjamin Chong
Benjamin Ong
Benjamin Teoh
Benjamin Yue
Benjamin Wong
Ben Realapple

Brian Voo
Bryan Cheong
Bryan Chan
Bryan Chang
Brian COD4 Player (Lucky Guy)
Bryan Teoh

Charmaine Leong
Charmaine Tan
Charmaine Cheah Mun Yee

Calvin Kau
Calvin John Ho
Calvin Chin
Calvin Loo
Calvin Nicholas

Cheryl Ang
Cheryl Lai
Cheryl Lum
Cheryl Leong
Sheryl Gan

David Hie
David Yap
David Owen
David Xavier

Debbie Ong
Debbie Chen

Debra Jean
Debra Low

Derek Chin
Derek Choong
Deric Leong
Derrick Johnson

Edmond Lee
Edmund Chan

Edwin Chan
Edwin Chan (Kylie's bro.)

Emily Ling
Emily Yeo

Eric Goh
Eric Ong
Eric Chaos
Eric Lam
Eric Goh
Eric my school senior haha

Eugene Gerard
Eugene Leong

Han Lim
Han Sheng
Han Sern
Han Shiang
Han Jie
Han Jiang
Han Lim
Han Jun
Han Mei
Han Yi

Ian Ding
Ian Adly
Ian Koh
Ian Wong

Jason Foo
Jason Teon
Jason Lee
Jason Mraz!

Jeffrey Voon
Jeffrey Chew
Jeffrey Tan

Jess Jing Yi
Jessica Ho
Jessica Yong
Jessica Ng

Joanna Ho
Joanna Choong

Joanne Chuah
Joanne Gan

Jocelyn Cheah
Jocelyn Yap

Joel Khor
Joel Lee
Joel Wong
Joel Yee

Jonathan Aw
Jonathan Hiu
Jonathan Teoh
Jonathan Lee
Jonathan Khor
Jonathan Ooi
Jonathan Siao
Jonathan Yip

Josh Chan
Joshua Ang
Joshua Chang
Joshua Tan
Joshua Yap

Justin Heng
Justin Lee
Justin Lim
Justin Wong
Justin Lourdes

Kelvin Ng
Kelvin Loo
Kelvin Wu

Kenny Lim
Kenny Ng

Li Ching
Li Hua
Li Xia xD
Li Lian
Li San
Li Theng x 2
Li Yong
Li May
Li-Shen

Nicholas Lee
Nicholas Leng
Nicholas Leong
Nicholas Lim
Nicholas Chew
Nicholas Cheng

Rachael Mohan
Rachel Mak
Rachel Hoo
Rachel Tong
Rachel Mooi
Rachel Wong

Sarah Mokhtar
Sarah Tay

Sean Ong
Sean Toh
Shaun Chang

Stefanie Lee
Stephanie Beh

Syahira Ghazali Shera
Shahira Mahmud
Nur Syahirah Ganko
Syahirah Rahim

Pei Yee
Pei Chen
Pei Xuan
Pei Shan

Tiffany Chan
Tiffany Beh

Wai Chew
Wai Kuan
Wai Se
Wai Leng
Wai Lum
Wan Tian
Wanke

Wei Ching
Wei Liang
Wei Liong
Wei Lun
Wei Ren
Wei Hann
Wei Siong
Wei Xiong
Wei Yee

Yi Lyn
Yi Theng
Yi Xiang
Yi Zhen

Zainal Arif
Zainal Ariff
Zainal Azlan


hahahah! Random post~

Nitez, wanna go eat.

Hmm.

I was just talking to a friend and suddenly it made me wonder: Am i always misunderstood? Has there been a bunch of friends that had been backstabbing me?

Hey, i know backstabbing are happening all the time, but maybe, just maybe, they're backstabbing about the wrong things about me. It might be the right thing yes, but then when i think about it again, it is like all the bad, sad, depressing, negative thoughts that come haunting me.

I know a bunch of friends that laugh at little things, jokes about others and have fun laughing about it. No doubt that everyone has to talk about someone for the sake of joking about, hm, and i still dont see why its me.

You know what, i think i am always misunderstood. LoL.

I actually had a pretty good day today, wanted to blog about my dinner reunion with my family and relatives but suddenly as i was talking to this particular friend, it hit me hard.
I know there are friends out there that i already know about who had already back-stabbed me. When they see me they say hi and talk to me just like a friend, then after that they'll backstab me. Oh yes i do know this handful of people, but i try hard not to show how displease i am with them, or maybe im just bad at hating people? Though i know deep down in me it disappoints me a whole lot.

I guess i am pretty easy misunderstood by many, girls or boys alike. Or maybe i was just trying to be nice/friendly too much people think i overdo it?

Ah, the real reason is still left unknown. I know there are people out there who dislike a certain character or attitude or simply just me, i just feel like if you feel that way, then why dont you just let me know.. Yeah it hurts but its the truth.. Dont truth hurts?

Haha, at moments like this, i just see myself as an empty paper: unknown, untouched, unseen, and also void; complete void.

Is there something wrong with me? I couldnt see it. I am always this blind until someone wakes me up.

Ahh. Everything has its limits. Maybe i overdo mine. That's why people misunderstands me so much.

Anyways, signing off.

Nites world. :)